Since earlier this year I have been following the story of a campus minister I knew in Oklahoma who was caught in an underage sex sting. This is a story that details some of his descent into the life that led to his current jail sentence. I don't post this to expose him or shame him any more than he already has been, but to show how one little thing leads to another and another, and pretty soon you are renting a motel room across the state and attempting to pick up a 13 year old girl to have sex all night. I believe wholeheartedly that he did not begin his online habits with the intent to sodomize a little girl, but the slippery slope of sinfulness had a horrific crash at the bottom for him.

I wrote a post back in February about how how there must have been a million outs at every turn of events for him. The above story confirms that there were several moments where he almost got on the interstate and drove back home because something didn't feel right. Of course, by that time, "not feeling right" about the situation was being concerned that it might be a setup, rather than "I'm attempting to have sex with a 13 year old girl." But nevertheless, the outs were there and the urge to call everything off was present.

This is why honesty and accountability are so essential. I would be foolish to think that I am immune to the kind of downward spiral this campus minister took in his life. But this is why I have learned to proactively seek accountability from people willing to ask me hard questions. I am blessed to work with spiritual leaders who understand this - I meet with one of my elders for about an hour and a half every week mostly to talk about life, ministry, and personal issues. I don't know anything for sure, but my guess is that this minister did not have these kinds of relationships active in his life. Being totally honest with people who are committed to loving you through it all is the very first out you have in bypassing the descent into sinful self-destruction. Sin thrives in a life of secrecy.

Right now I am teaching through the Torah and just read a source that refers to the "Ethical Decalogue."

Without cheating, can you tell me what this is talking about?

Lately I've been facing the horrific masochistic realities of eating disorders. I've always known this was a reality in the world around me, but have never been as close to the problem as I am now. It is so painful seeing a beautiful young woman waste her body and spirit away because of the vicious lies of Satan that she so wholeheartedly believes. To have an attractive, goal-oriented college student telling you, through tears, that she wants her body to be emaciated and wasting away because it would match how she feels inside is truly heartbreaking. For the mind to become so weakened by deprivation that it only makes things worse by telling you that your sip of water is loaded with calories is a kind of self-mutilating self-destruction that is beyond words. In this kind of abuse not only is the soul damaged but the physical heart slowly begins to digress into a slow, coma-like state because it simply does not have what it takes to pump. It is a form of self-loathing that is complete in almost every way - it cuts you off from people by making them (in your own mind) your judge and enemy, it destroys your body, it warps your mind, it perverts healthy activity into self-destructive overexercise, it erodes you spiritually (by convincing you that not even God can accept you), and, if left uncontrolled, kills you. It is almost the perfect Satanic package.

I have been left feeling powerless in some ways because it is not a problem I can truly understand. But I know that is not what I am called to. I know that God wants to use me and others to somehow crack open the door of his power and love to those who have blinded themselves to it. To serve as a connecting point to the help that they really need and the people that can truly guide them on a path that they have been on before and overcome by the power of God. To be someone who really can be trusted and show that genuine trust and non-judgment is possible. I'll be honest, it is emotionally taxing, but looking to God to be the savior and not myself really helps keep that balance.

Real life. Wow.


How I wish this was not so deadly accurate.

Lately I've been inundated (mostly on Facebook) with the Pirates vs. Zombies (or Ninjas) phenomenon. I even just looked at a photo gallery of a big event in Minneapolis where people took to the streets as Pirates and Zombies in some sort of mock war against each other. This is quite a big deal going on right now, but I haven't gotten involved in it. Still, I have to wonder what is fueling this circus of wackiness and I think it just occurred to me.

We are obviously in some sort of strange culture war right now. It seems that popular culture is demanding that you be on one side or the other. Even popular media guys who have criticized this phenomenon have ended up participating in it themselves, like John Stewart. He brilliantly lambasted the Crossfire personnel for what they were doing to the American discourse, but lately he seems to be slowly becoming some of that himself by relentlessly ridiculing anything that even remotely treads into an intellectual area he has obviously claimed. But, this post is not a commentary on John Stewart. It is notable, however, that a certain news network felt the need to counter his show with the "Half-Hour News Hour." Just the continuation of people taking stands and doing nothing but jabbing at each other.

I was recently invited to be on the radio in Manhattan to talk about Cats for Christ. A great opportunity, right? I took some time to research the show I would be interviewed on and found that its entire format, and host, was a highly politically extreme polemic-spewing talkfest. So I met with the host and politely turned him down, because, frankly, I do not want God's mission associated with any part of the rabid clenched-teeth socio-political bullcrap that is consuming America right now.

It occurred to me sometime in high school that we seem to be a culture that thrives in the extremes. It even shows up in the little ways that we talk: "That's the coolest thing I've ever seen" usually just means "I like that." We thrive on words like "always," and "never," and there is a two-option classification system for everything: it's either "best or worst," "black or white," "good or evil," or, *CRINGE*, "liberal or conservative." Many of our cultural (i.e. political, religious, media) leaders stake their intellectual and/or moral claim in some kind of pre-defined ideological camp and immediately start firing weapons at whatever the "other side" is. Discourse is immediately shoved aside in favor of the fight for ideological victory against enemies who are obviously evil and bent on destroying you and eroding all of society with them.

I wish I was just thinking of one or two examples here that truly were extreme and outside of the norm. But I am growing weary because this is what I am seeing time and time again almost every day. Rush Limbaugh and Al Franken. Bill O'Reilly and Keith Olbermann. Rabid Anti-war protesters and "glass parking lot" campaigners. Fred Phelps and Gay Pride Parades. "Everybody should be Christian and Republican" (that one was on TV today) and "religion is the scourge of society." "Kill the terrorists!" and "9/11 was an inside job." "Gay Marriage Now!" and "God Hates Fags!"

It is no shock or surprise that extreme positions exist. Always have, always will. But what is concerning me is the overwhelming pressure that seems to exist that you must be on one side or the other, and not only that, be at war with the "other side." There is even a Facebook widget that will determine if you are **CRINGE** "liberal" or "conservative." But this wouldn't be half as bad if it didn't overtly mean that if you are labeled "liberal" that "conservatives" are your arch-enemy seeking to war-monger and legislate your morals. Similarly, if you are "conservative," "liberals" are apparently socialists only seeking to destroy the very fabric of society with cultural poison. But what makes me sad the most is not seeing these messages pushed from street corners or ratings-whoring talk shows, but proclaimed from the real leaders of our nation, political and otherwise. Especially in these early days of the looming presidential race, we have potential candidates from across the political spectrum, er, I mean divide, who are shamelessly and desperately pandering to their "base." "Conservatives" are doing everything possible to prove how "conservative" they are and "liberals" doing likewise. Candidates (one in particular) who have managed to carve out stances unique to their views that happen to draw from multiple points on the ideological scale are getting panned mercilessly for not being "black enough" or "conservative enough." Presidents are now decided upon based on extreme, unanswerable hot button issues rather than their competency to lead an do what is best for all of America. Which way one goes on abortion is more important than fiscal policy, foreign relations, domestic development, social programs, experience, ability to govern, and popular awareness. We have a system whose leaders are largely determined by single issues and labels rather than the competency of the individual. Party-line voting proves this. Many draw their identity from the fact that "I am a Democrat" or "I am a Republican" rather than "I am someone who thinks for myself at all times." And Libertarians, you guys are just as bad.

But, this discussion was hardly just about politics. Actually, it was about Pirates and Zombies. In a way, that whole phenomenon seems to be an outlet for the huge need to pick a side in a completely made-up war and fight it with all your might and creativity. Why do you decide to be a Pirate or Zombie? Usually for completely ridiculous, arbitrary reasons. But the funny thing is, the longer you hold onto that label, the more you believe that you are the superior and the harder you fight and the more you invest into the war. But, to the outsider, it all seems a bit ridiculous and far-fetched. Unfortunately, I'm not sure that Pirates vs. Zombies is nearly as stupid as what we are doing with the culture war.

The ChipIn widget now seems to be functioning as it should. Thank you to those who have contributed so far (namely, Kaylynn over at Facebook!).

After installing and testing the ChipIn widget both here and over at Facebook, neither are working all of the sudden. I apologize for any inconvenience or annoyance this has caused as I launch into the crazy world of fundraising.

Now that I am a full-fledged campus minister one of my priorities is facilitating mission opportunities for my students. One of the organizations I think does this best for students is called Let's Start Talking (LST), which helps organize, train, and send teams overseas for six weeks during the summer to help non-native English speakers practice their conversational English. We do this by using the book of Luke as a basis of reading and conversation sessions with individuals for upwards of 10 hours per day, five days a week, for six weeks.

Thankfully, my ministry, Cats for Christ, has been working with LST for almost 15 years so Cats for Christ and the Manhattan church is already deeply invested.

This is where you come in. My goal is to join my students in this work overseas every summer, or at least every summer that it is practical for me to do so. Being part of an LST team requires raising $3200 in funds. This money facilitates every part of the project, from travel to housing to food.

I am in the beginning stages of my fundraising efforts for the summer of 2008 and would like for you to consider how you can help in this effort in any way. To make it easy for anyone who visits this blog, I have placed a ChipIn widget on the sidebar (please click here if you are reading this on an RSS reader) that makes donating very easy by allowing you to safely and securely use your credit or debit card through PayPal. Also, any money that is contributed over $3,200 (which will also include direct payments to LST on my behalf that I will solicit through the mail) will go towards the fundraising efforts of the students involved.

Please pray and consider how you may help in this effort. I have worked LST projects in Germany and Ukraine and they have changed my life in profound ways and I have seen the lives of students transformed by relying solely on their faith to journey across the world into strange and amazing places to share the story of God with people eager to learn.

Thank you very much for considering this.

This was an exhausting day... up at 8:00 to meet people for the K-State/KU football game at 9:00, standing in the stadium screaming like a madman until 2:00, rushing back to the campus center to change out of purple and into crimson, turning the OU/Texas football game on, screaming like a madman until 6:30, eating a Chipotle burrito, watching a movie, and now getting ready to turn in. It's a hard life, but somebody's got to do it.

Oh, and, ahem.... BOOMER SOONER.

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In other news, during my half hour of being at home today before now, I unfortunately learned of yet another way the division in my faith movement is continuing.

A number of years ago, a winter break retreat for college students was created by a Church of Christ in the southeast and held on a Gulf Coast beach each year. This retreat began to grow and now is a massive gathering of state school college students from all around the southeast and other parts of the nation, now known as the Gulf Coast Getaway. It now has over 2,000 college students coming every year and, in my opinion, is one of the premier worship events backed by Churches of Christ, and I would say rivals many of the large worship events of the larger Christian world. I have had the privilege of being there for it at the Edgewater Beach Resort in Panama City Beach, Florida, and it is amazing. The next one will be January 18-20.

But, today I come across some information for a thing called Encounter Campus Challenge, which is apparently a Church of Christ thing too, at... take a guess... Edgewater Beach Resort, Panama City, Florida. When is it? Wait for it..... January 11-13!

Wha?

So, I poke around on the website to get some more info. This is the text of the "about" page in its entirety:

This is the Middle Ground you have been searching for. We want to serve and worship God without all the controversy. ECC is focused on what is right instead of what is wrong. Our goal is unity. It is our desire to provide an atmosphere comfortable and free from controversy. As such we ask everyone attending ECC to “consider others more than themselves” and focus on unity.

We humbly request just worship– no instruments, no clapping, no controversy. Look forward to seeing you at ECC.

Obviously no direct accusations on this site itself, but apparently Gulf Coast Getaway is focused on what is wrong instead of what is right. Apparently Gulf Coast Getaway is built upon controversy. Apparently Gulf Coast Getaway goes beyond worship by allowing people to express themselves as they wish... including clapping.

But what makes me want to cry is that the following statement is being proclaimed as a goal of a Christian gathering:

It is our desire to provide an atmosphere comfortable and free from controversy.

I am trying to imagine God meeting with The Son before his descending out of the spiritual realms into the person of Jesus Christ and reminding him: "Remember, it is my desire to provide an atmosphere comfortable and free from controversy."

I am trying to imagine Jesus Christ standing before the disciples, charging them with the task of carrying the message to the lands around them and ultimately to the entire world, but adding "but make sure you provide an atmosphere that is comfortable and free from controversy."

I am trying to imagine Paul thinking about his next trip into Athens or sitting down to write the Corinthians or the Galatians, and making a note to himself: "Make sure you provide an atmosphere that is comfortable and free from controversy."

I am trying to imagine Jesus Christ climbing up the hillside to address the crowds before him, and Matthew chapter 5 now reading like this: "I am Jesus. Follow me and I will make you comfortable and you will not experience controversy."

I'm also trying to imagine Jesus, or Paul, or ANYONE in scripture saying, "Make sure you all worship in exactly the same way at the same time and that you do nothing except sing, in approved four part harmony, the words set before you in the hymnal. Any emotion of any kind, especially that which results in rhythmic expressions of the hands is strictly forbidden. Oh and, worship is only what happens between opening and closing prayer. If anyone of your spiritual family ends up varying from these decrees in any way, you are to immediately disassociate yourselves with such evildoers, as they are only trying to destroy uniformity, er, I mean unity." Actually I think this is in 1 Fullofcrappians chapter 6.

But most tragic of all is the sad betrayal of one of their own stated goals: unity. They seek unity by way of separation. We now have two groups, who I honestly believe each want to serve God in the best way possible, doing essentially the exact same thing in exactly the same place, at almost exactly the same time. Who is the one promoting disunity - the ones following the vision given to them by God for an event to effect the lives of college students or the ones doing an event whose entire identity is about not being like the other event?

Somewhere Satan is sitting in a comfy chair in the corner smoking a pipe and laughing his head off.